Monday, June 1, 2020

5 immediate ways to deal with anger



We could all do with some tips on how to deal with anger, especially now, when everyone seems to be having some kind of added stress into their lives, to say the least. Uncertainty brings out the worst in us and it becomes difficult to be understanding and compassionate all the time.

To avoid treating people in your life unfairly and put unnecessary negative energy into your already emotional self, you may want to implement one or more of the following tactics to help yourself immediately deal with anger.


1.     Distance yourself from the situation

Whatever it is that is causing you anger, always try to get away as soon as possible, in a safe manner. When dealing with people, move away physically. If it’s a complex event/situation, try to breathe and focus for a while and if possible move on to a different task/problem/mindset. 

The sooner you allow yourself to get out of the stress, the smaller the timeframe in which you expose yourself to danger is. Because being angry and getting your blood go high does nothing good for you.

2.     Know that your reason and feelings will change later

No matter how much your head is exploding and how much your blood is pumping through your veins, you will always feel less angry and calmer in a matter of minutes/hours/days depending on your personality. Even the toughest amongst us and the biggest grunge holders will find a sweet spot in their heart and feel less harsh towards what happened initially. 

If you struggle with seeing things out of your perspective, start by putting yourself into the other side’s shoes. How would you feel, react and what would you say if you were arguing with you? This exercise might as well teach you things about yourself if done honestly and repeatedly. You might end up improving your way of thinking, debating and behaving while hot-blooded.

3.     Don’t say and do things you can’t take back

Never say the first thing that comes to your mind when angry. It will rarely be forgotten by either you or the one you are arguing with. Words hurt and they tend to hurt more and be taken more personally while debating or fighting with others. It goes without saying that it’s the same unwritten rule for actions. Don’t do things you can’t undo. 

Think of it this way. You can always do something later and take all the revenge you like, but once something is done, it can’t be undone. So, it’s better to wait than hurry when it comes to anger.

4.     Turn negative energy into positive one

Usually when I am angry, I like to be on my own and mostly get distracted by scrolling through social media or mindlessly watching a movie/series. But if I don’t let myself do this, I feel better doing chores around the house or even cleaning (the last one happens when I am extremely angry/upset). 

You can choose to do whatever you like when not feeling like yourself, but how awesome is it that you can use your negative energy to create something positive, like doing those things you usually hate/procrastinate endlessly? For the creative types, being a little angry might lead to a sudden creativity burst, so don’t hesitate to use it. Not only you will have a new creation made, but chances are anger will have vanished a lot quicker by pouring your feelings into what you love doing. 

5.     Reflect and digest what you just learned

The last thing that crosses one’s mind amidst a stressful situation is trying to take notes, but just try to consider it for a minute. If you pay attention to yourself while you are in a tense situation, you might as well learn valuable stuff. For example, try to remember how you feel, how fast you react, how easy it is to get you lose your temper, whether it is by words or cursing or physical the way you wish to respond to others. 

Paying attention to all these, or at least trying to recall what happened as soon as you chill and feel more like yourself is very beneficial. Should you have to go through a similar situation with the same people or not, you can be a little more prepared as to what to expect from yourself, knowing where the limit is, how much you can handle and most importantly when to decide to do yourself a favor and walk away from unpleasant events that might not end well for you.


Feel free to let me know any other tips you have discovered that help you deal with anger. I would also love to hear from you after practicing any of the tips above. What works for me, might not work at all for you, so let’s compare our experiences.


~ Love, Lisa ~

2 comments:

  1. Thanks for sharing this valuable and understanding article with us.
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  2. Thank you so much for this Lisa I really needed this even my friend how is a stress relief teacher couldn’t help but you where perfect!!! ❤️

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